Sunday, May 4, 2008

You Know You're A Creationist If... Part II

Anyone remember my last post on "You Know You're a Creationist"? Please submit any ideas you have, I intend to build on this.

You know you're a creationist if...


...You call evolution a dogma, and then complain that scientists are always changing their story.


...You think evolution is a big conspiracy that no one can dissent from, yet you point to scientists' disagreements to show how unstable evolutionary theory is.


...You claim that similarity isn't evidence of common descent, but never second guess a DNA paternity test.

18 comments:

Joel said...

Sorry I'm late to the party, missed the first post.

YKYACI...you haven't had a science class since high school yet claim to have out-thought career scientists who have spent decades in active research.

AIGBusted said...

Good one Joel!

It never ceases to amaze me how creationists have the arrogance to think that 99% of Biology PhD's are making elementary errors.

jere said...

You know you're a creationist if...

...you claim that scientific evidence exists for an ancient global flood but when you try to explain it you end up heaping one miracle on top of another.

Eugene said...

You know you're a creationist when...

you are baffled as to why the people you debate keep referencing "straw men" since you know you didn't mention The Wizard of Oz even once!

you think a reasoned argument featuring logic reason and proper sources can be rendered null and void simply by saying "You are wrong/thats not true"

you insist the pyramids must be younger than 4400 years because that's when the Flood happened!

Efrique said...

You know you're a creationist if...

... you think God invented logic, but think circular arguments are fine

or

... you think God invented logic, but think faith trumps using it


(take your pick with this one...)

Benjamin Franklin said...

You know you're a Creationist if...


You use Kent Hovind's accountant.

Corbie said...

...you say, "atheism is a religion."

...you call "The Theory of Evolution" "Darwinism".

...you say, "Stalin and Hitler were atheists."

...you say, "If man was descended from apes, why do we still have apes?"

...you say anything at all about god being proven by bananas. ;)

...you make inane mumblings about "information".

Benjamin Franklin said...

You know you're a Creationist if...


You already have Expelled at the top of your Netflix queue.
.
.
.

Benjamin Franklin said...

You know you're a Creationist if...

You have an autographed picture of Ken Ham.

Benjamin Franklin said...

You know you're a Creationist if...

you say "If you don't believe in the bible, you can't know right from wrong"

jere said...

You know you're a creationist if...

you think "Expelled: No Intelligence Allowed" is a good film.

Corbie said...

This is fun...in a twisted kind of way.

YKYACI...you scream, "Persecution!!!" if anyone questions anything you say.

...you never question anything your religious leader says no matter how inane, insane or illegal it might be.

...you've ever used the phrase starting with, "You know, they laughed at Galileo..." without finishing it with, "...but they also laughed at Bozo the Clown."

...you've decorated everything that doesn't move (not excepting the dog) with decals, emblems or medallions including, but not limited to, Jesus fish, crosses, praying hands and/or crucifixes.

...you've ever worn a shirt that says, "Jesus: The Reason for the Season." (As an aside, I want one that says, "Axial Tilt: The REAL Reason for the Season(s).")

AIGBusted said...

These are interesting.

Keep em coming

; )

AigB

Corbie said...

...if you've ever started a statement with, "You're walking in the desert and you come across a watch...."

...if you've ever compared evolution to a hurricane plowing through a junkyard and leaving a DC-7 in its wake.

...if you've ever used the phrase, "irreducible complexity" with a straight face.

...if you've described cells as "machines", not as a very loose analogy, but because that's what they are.

...when shown the science behind evolution you say that, "there are other ways of knowing."

...you handwave so much you become very popular during hot weather.

Robert Morane said...

You know you're a creationist when...

You claim that Evolution doesn't explain this or that, but when a biologist gives you an answer, you dismiss it by saying "evolution has an answer to everything, doesn't it?"

Robert M.

AIGBusted said...

Even better, Robert, is when they say, "Evolution could never explain such and such" And when they get an answer, they dismiss it as speculation.

Eugene said...

You know you're a creationist if...

you think that listening to what Kent Hovind tells you about "evilutionists" constitutes "looking into both sides of the debate"

Brianna said...

you know you're a creationist when...

...you actually have a purpose for life.